Five minutes with… Adam Irelandes.


Irelandes on the ball against Naita Phoenix.


Adam, the Irish Terrier, Sparky.


‘False Benchwarmer’

Favourite beer to put in a shandy:

Oooh, tough one straight up, but I’m more of a vodka and cranberry girl myself.

Pre-game superstitions:

Listening to ‘Not Many’ by SCRIBE on repeat whilst Bennet styles my golden locks.

Favourite Hatchets moment:

That time when we played that match once because the opposition didn’t forfeit and the ref actually showed up.

What’s your secret to getting so many assists?

Inexplicable skill of getting into amazing goal scoring positions, realising I’ll probably miss, then hoofing the ball in the general direction of red shirt.

Team-mate you hate having to play on in training games:

Cecchi, every day Cecchi.  The term ‘blatant foul’ doesn’t truly encapsulate his footballing skillset.

At a team function / night out – who would be –

  1. a) Last man standing at end of a big night?
  2. b) The seediest when drunk?
  3. c) The most likely to start a pub brawl?
  1. Was going to say Drew, but he’s been rendered a bit impotent by the throes of fatherhood, probably John-Mark, it’s the quiet ones you’ve got to watch.
  2. Pierre. Hands down.
  3. I’m answering Cecchi, only because the question is who’d ‘start’ one, and not who’d be actively involved. Cecchi would start a pub brawl, smile and plead innocence and slowly shift to the back of the group.

Team mate you’d hate to live with most:

Simon Bennet.

How many games of FIFA have you played this week?

Not much actually!  This week’s been a little unusual, instead of the usual ‘GTF’ cycle of Gym, Tan, FIFA, I’ve been a responsible member of society and only played about 3 games this week.

Which Hatchets player would you choose to take on Naita Phoenix’s #10 in a no-holds-barred street fight?

I believe Bjorn has some unfinished business with number 10.. and Bjorn can fight. Right..? Is that racist? (Editor: It might be racist if Bjorn didn’t have so many damn knives in his kit bag)

Where was Jenya Demidenok really born?

If I told you, he’d have to kill you.

How do you deal with the inferiority complex that naturally arises from being an engineer in a team of doctors?

It’s definitely hard, but I’m good at compartmentalising things in my life. I play with so many doctors, so in turn; I’ve never gone to see a doctor in 9 years.  Not even about this rash that’s steadily getting worse.

I can’t seem to beat my PB of 12 reverse ab hinges in one set, do you have any tips to help me push over this hump? (Question submitted by Steven Cecchi)

It’s all about using your core, you can’t expect to stroll into ab hinges, otherwise you’ll experience a premature failure.  Remember, practice makes perfect.

Mario Götze is 22 and has a World Cup medal. What’s your excuse?


Who will score the winning goal for the Hatchets in this year’s grand final?

Kregg would be furious if it was anyone but him.

Nominate the next player to be interviewed:

I wonder if Steven Cecchi can take some time off practising ab hinges to answer some questions.

Irelandes will be making his final appearance this season for the Hatchets on Sunday morning, before he jets off to Africa for three months. Come along to Prentice Park at 9:30am to watch him try to extend his lead in the assists category vs Gustav Hurricanes.

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